I LAUGH FOR THE FUTURE AND FOR LIFE
The following testimonial is reproduced from the thread Progress started in the Shaolin Wahnam Discussion Forum on 5th June 2006.
“I laughed for the future and for life.”
When I think back to my reasons for starting kung fu I find them very difficult to clarify. I wanted to be 'better' than I was, I knew I needed to grow, I was intrigued by what I had read in Sigung's books and in the Forum, and I think I wanted an escape. I had practiced Chi Kung from the books for about 3 months and had been able to finally end 8 or so years of cannabis addiction, which brought an amazing sense of freedom to my life.
On arriving at my first class in Gillingham in July last year I was greeted with smiling faces and warmth unlike any I had encountered in a martial arts club. I wanted to be a part of this happy family before me and was greatly impressed by the calm friendliness of Sifu (Jordan).
Two weeks into my practice and I was fortunate enough to be able to attend the Chi Kung courses at Summer Camp and learn directly from Sigung; a truly great experience, which spring boarded my kung fu practice on my return to regular classes.
Diligent practice from then on brought a gradual brightening to my life, and finally allowed me to open enough to love those around me. My relationship with my family began improving and I met my now girlfriend, whom I am sure I would not be with if it wasn't for this opening of my heart caused by my practice.
I think it took me up until the January Intensive Kung Fu Course to begin to realize the depth of the emotional burden I had been carrying for most of my life. Intensive cleansing on the first night of the course introduced emotional buoyancy I had never felt before. I learnt so much on the course that is only now beginning to germinate.
I had a period of frustrated practice for the first couple of months afterwards; my stances felt wrong, I couldn't enter a chi kung state of mind properly, My techniques were executed poorly etc. With hindsight however I realize this was a great transitional period, and not a recession, through which my Sifu helped me greatly; with tweaks to my form, advice on my daily practice, and the constant heart to heart transmission I receive in each class. In fact if I watch myself on the videos of the course, which Wei Foong so kindly recorded, I almost cringe at what I thought was relatively competent form, execution, etc and at the foolish amount of pride I had about my meager abilities.
I have been thinking of writing a testimonial for a while now, but the time was not right. Now however it is. I am deep in the midst of heavy cleansing, riding an emotional roller coaster, and its fun! So fun in fact that I'm smiling from the heart just thinking about it, actually I'm smiling from the heart most of the time now . I had a great weekend: On Saturday I started crying. I cried for a lost little boy, I cried for years of hate and loneliness, and I cried for everyone now feeling how I had felt. After maybe 20 minutes of weeping, my tears began to mix with laughter, which in turn mixed with insane cackling. I laughed for the future and for life.
Thank you Sigung, Sifu, Family. Thank you for reading.
Namo Guan Shi Yin Pu Sa
5th June 2006.